Finally, Finding Purpose
You have finally taken the time to
stop by and check what my blog is all about! Well, thank you for stopping by. I
am excited to let you in on what goes through my mind, thinking out loud.
Writing, reading, and being on the
spot have always been something that I love. As a young girl, I remember
reading newspapers in the living room or the kitchen sometimes as my mum was
cooking.
With writing, I remember writing
exemplary compositions in school. It never dawned on me that I would be in love
with writing. To me, it was just something I was expected to do. I needed the
grades; the only way to do that was by getting high scores on subjects I
genuinely loved. And I got that.
The grades got me admitted to high
school, Maai Mahiu Girls. Not your ordinary school, but I will tell this story
in consequent blogs. A month in, I joined the journalism team. There had been
eight parade sessions, and the journalism girlies enticed me. I remember being
super excited when they let me join the club.
I am an over-planner, so I started immediately
because I was sure they would test my skills. I occasionally rushed to the
washroom to get my practice in. with boarding schools, it is difficult to be in
one place alone, and the washroom was the only place. Friday comes, and law and
behold, I am in the queue to read the news. I was only briefed that morning,
and I was nervous. It is all I have ever wanted; why was I freaking out?
I get the script and rewrite it so that
I can fathom and coherently read out the school updates. The bell rings, and at
this point, I'm shaking. I want to quit! It was always close to the last
segment. Believe that I felt those minutes fly. Why have we just gotten here?
Now it's my turn to go on the podium.
That part about loving the spotlight,
I thought to myself, maybe not. I walked up there. Remember, this is a new
face, so everyone is breaking their necks to understand why she joined that
group. Is she good enough? I was overthinking, but the students were expecting
at least something. I cannot remember if I did great, but I remember
criticizing myself so much because I read 'Mariah Carey wrong. It went
something like 'Ma-ra-ya Ka-re'. Yeah, I get it. You'd laugh too.
I've thought I was a star; I love the
spotlight, only to blow it up. I regretted joining the club. Some students
teased me with the pronunciation here and there, but that did not matter just
because I missed that one.
Welcome to my first encounter with
other people's opinions of me. I am happy that it never stopped me. I became
better; I became the star. I used to look forward to parade days. It kept me
moving. I wrote my scripts and read a lot to have something to write and
deliver.
Most importantly, I researched a lot
to have the poise as I read through my scripts. I was not doing this alone; I
had my club-mate, who we later were elected as the club chairperson. From
interviews to debates to class presentations, I knew this was my purpose deep
down. After all these accomplishments, I had to leave. I'll tell you why and
how in my next one!
Comments
Post a Comment